Should You Say 'Yes' and Then 'No' to a Job Offer?

What's the right way of declining a job offer you just accepted?

Dec 05, 2023

Hello Friends 👋

Recently, a friend of mine faced a dilemma.

He had just accepted a job offer from a local firm. A week later, a dream company he had applied to earlier offered him a position.

He was torn.

He was unsure whether he should stick to his commitment or pursue his dream job.

This situation isn't uncommon, but it poses an ethical and professional challenge.

So! What would you do?

As a Hiring Manager, what is my take on this?

There's no one right answer when it comes to whether it's okay to accept and then decline a job offer.

It really depends on what you feel is right or wrong.

But if you can, try to avoid getting into a situation where you have to back out after saying yes.

You have a 2-way responsibility here.

Towards the company you’re waiting for:

Let them (the company you’re waiting for) know about your current situation. This is especially true if you would prefer their offer over the one you have now.

Some companies might even speed up their decision-making for you.

Others might commit to giving you a decision quickly, especially after your interview.

Towards the company you’ve got the offer from:

Ask them for a bit more time to respond to your current offer.

A second extension of just a few days usually won't mess up the company's recruiting plans.

I've noticed that larger companies are often more willing to do this than smaller ones.

The big companies want you to be really excited about joining them, whereas smaller companies might try to pressure you into making a quick decision, especially if they can't compete with the larger ones.

Asking for a few extra days is always better than accepting an offer and then changing your mind.

The worst-case scenario is that they say no and stick to the original deadline, but at least you tried. In the best case, they give you the extra time, and you can make a more informed decision without having to compromise your ethics.

The Common Mistake

A common mistake people make is not asking for enough time.

They often think they'll get responses from other companies quicker than they actually do, so why risk it?

They are scared that the company will withdraw the offer.\

Here’s the thing.

It's unusual for a company to take back an offer just because you asked for more time.

Doing so would reflect badly on them and could harm their future recruiting efforts.

Most would prefer to push you to make a decision and have you decline their offer rather than having to withdraw the offer themselves.

This protects their brand better.

The same applies to you.

If you accept an offer and then rescind it a week later, the real damage is that you've broken a promise.

This might not be a legal issue, and people might forget it in a year.

But!

There will always be someone who remembers and might see you as dishonest or unethical.

In a corporation, everything is built on relationships and your reputation.

I believe that you get treated the way you treat others. If you're fair to people, that fairness will come back to you, often in indirect ways.

So I recommend following a simple rule.

"If you're contemplating a change, consider the consequences on your reputation."

I always advise people to be upfront with prospective employers and try not to put themselves in a position where they have to accept and then decline an offer.

Sure, people do back out of offers and sometimes get away with it, but from a personal values perspective, I don't agree with it.

Like my friend, when faced with a job offer dilemma, consider the impact of your decision on your future. Making an informed and ethical choice is important for long-term success.

Have a great week!

Vibhor

Things I thought about a lot this week

The following thoughts consumed most of my time and attention last week.

1. Your reputation is built through repeated actions.

2. The best things in life are self-evident

If you have to ask if you have them, then it means you probably don’t.

If you have to ask if you feel happy, then you probably don’t.
If you have to ask if you feel loved, then you probably don’t.
If you have to ask if you are successful, then you’re probably not.
If you have to ask if you are healthy, then you’re probably not.

And instead of accepting this simple truth, we avoid it by endlessly overcomplicating the definitions of love, happiness, success, etc.

3. Stop stretching.

If you're feeling anxious about achieving success, love, or happiness in a particular area of your life, consider giving it up for a while.

Initially, this may seem terrifying and may feel like you're letting yourself down. However, it's often the act of letting go of our deepest desires that makes them more accessible to us than ever before.

My Favourite Things This Week

Book: Right Kind of Wrong by Amy Edmondson

Imagine understanding failure in a whole new way – that's what this book does. The book breaks down different types of failures and is packed with real-life stories that are super relatable. If you want to start seeing your setbacks as stepping stones, you've got to give this book a read.

Movie: Top Gun: Maverick

I admire Tom Cruise, not just because he's a big name in blockbusters, but for his insane work ethic, especially in "Top Gun: Maverick" (2023).

This movie really shows how dedicated he is - the guy actually did those crazy aerial stunts himself! It's not just cool to watch; it feels super real and takes the excitement to a whole new level.

Plus, seeing him bring back Maverick with that mix of old-school cool and new twists? Absolutely awesome. It's like he never runs out of ways to wow us.

Quote of the Week

"Embracing failure is not about celebrating mistakes, but about recognizing that each mistake paves a unique path to deeper understanding and wisdom. Our greatest growth often comes from the lessons we learn when things don’t go as planned."

From Right Kind of Wrong by Amy Edmondson

Most watched YouTube video last week

Business and IT can actually work in perfect alignment to create great products. In this video, I talk about Impact Maps as a strategic tool to help align the objectives of Business and IT teams.

Last Week’s Posts

🙏 Thank You!

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Here, I try to give you Career, Progress, and Self-Development insights as I learn them myself.

Wish you a successful career journey ahead.

Until next week 👋

“I share things I wish I knew in the starting years of my career in the corporate world."

Vibhor Chandel

Winning Strategy

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